While looking back recently, I am reminded of a song that got me though a lot of the tougher days over the past few years. That song is “Not Alone” by the band Red. I remember hearing it once on the radio and thinking it was a good song, and pulling out my phone to find out the name so I could look it up again later. When I got home I remember taking it and saving it in a Spotify playlist but I don’t think I listened to it then.
A while later, I remember having a difficult day, and had gone to a playlist that contained some songs I would commonly listen to when feeling down. When I got to “Not Alone,” it was the first time that I had fully listened to it and was really able to listen to the lyrics. I don’t remember too much about what happened after that that day, but I know that this song became one of my favorite songs and I started listening to it tons after that day.
You’re lost and so afraid
Where is the hope in a world so cold?
There are many times in life that can feel very lonely. For me, the loneliest times were just after starting collage. I didn’t keep in contact with people I knew from high school as good well as I would have liked. I also didn’t make almost any friends at school. I didn’t move in to dorms or anything, and stayed living at home, and that did isolate me and made making new friends at school very difficult. It didn’t help that the few friends I did try to stay close to happened to be very busy and combined, it was generally a very lonely time for me. In these kinds of times, it can be incredibly hard to feel like you are loved, even by God. It is very easy to get mad at God for putting you in that situation. Also, especially if it is one of the harder things you have had to deal with in your life, it is also incredibly hard to feel like there is any hope of escaping that loneliness.
You’re living in fear that no one will hear your cries
Again, the hope that things will get better isn’t something that seems remotely possible while in the situation. If I were able to see where I am now at that time, I would have been able to see that those feelings wouldn’t last forever. I hit my lowest point at the end of that year, and after that, things got steadily better. Sure it wasn’t always an uphill progression all the time, the hard times don’t completely stop, but being able to see the progression I would make in the next year, it would have given me tons more hope than I did have.
Lost in the rain again
When will it ever end?
The arms of relief seem so out of reach
One of the hardest parts of the whole experience for me were the times when I didn’t even feel like I was loved by God. Even though, like I have talked about before, I may have known at a head level that I was loved, but that doesn’t always change the way that it feels in the hard moments. But the good news is we don’t have to feel that way, and this song is one thing that helped me to realize this.
I am with you
I will carry you through it all
I won’t leave you, I will catch you
When you feel like letting go
‘Cause you’re not, you’re not alone
This is the promise that God gives to all of his children. He will always be with us. He is with us in the good times, and we usually recognize that. But the more importantly, when we are struggling, He is there too. And he will bring us through those times. They are not the end, they are just a difficult part. This is something I had to realize and completely let my heart believe before I was able to at all confident that the future could be any better than the way I was feeling at the time. Especially my lowest point, at which time I did feel like letting go. I didn’t want to continue trying. But God stepped in and gave me what I needed right when I needed it, and that saved my life. It was the first time in my life I had to COMPLETELY let Him take over, and has been one of the biggest impacts on my entire life. Like the song says, He will catch us like He caught me, when we are feeling like letting go, which I was.
We are not alone.